you caught me
damn it
running in circles again and again
i thought i was your friend at first
i thought the worst
was over
i thought myself as sober
but really
i was none of the sort

so, where did we go?
to Bannefield?
to where the birds all gather
and the grass grows green?
I found us
and life will find us
stretched out across the lawn
shadowed by magnolias
and gravestones

i will never be able to look at you again

to the town
we walked
with bread
and water
and thoughts of our daughter

riding my bike home
i passed
the stop where you used to live
i passed
the road where we used to meet
and i passed the street
where
we held hands and kept our feet
walking the pavement right
afraid of what people would think

i grabbed your head
you grabbed my skull
you wrote me in
i drew you well
and all the time i couldn't think
was just time
for your hands to slip
down to my own
and alone
alone
no longer
alone