The parts where i relive my secrets?
The parts where i am afraid?
The parts i will soon forget?
The parts i regret?
The parts where i am happy?
Sad?
Tired?
Hungover?
Drunk?
The parts i will never tell anybody?
The parts about my past?
The parts about my future?
The reflections on historical events that have changed my life?
The loves?
The lack there of?
The scandal?
The day to day monotony?

Or would you read my thoughts at all?

Labels: alone, live, love, Nothing, random, Thoughts, writing

This is the world
this is how the world looks
inside out and backwards as i lay
face down and wait for time to pass by
for the photon clock to tick
and the light year
to arrive
i wait.......
while the pen draws the paper black
i sift through thoughts and phrases in my head
words spill out my mouth in all directions
and i wonder if i could sit back
and just be
just
let me be the silent observer
and turn off my mouth switch
turn off my thought button
and revive my senses
resuscitate my being
this nervous tick

this nihilism

yet, over and over
i search
i am the wild goose chase
i am the treadmill
i am the spinning wheels
turning grain to dust

new life is nothing but a chance
to do with what you please
what pleases me
to be content
contentualism:
the less i expose myself
the less i open my mind
the easier it is to be content

i open up my eyes
on to an ocean of sight and revenue
stretching out for miles, changing colours
i reach out my arms for a little closure
breaking away
my reality feels like
a bad dream
a commitment is just that
you owe me
you will soon find out
and i turn over

Labels: content, dream, nihilism, Nothing, poem, writing

this is me standing
and you are watching, waiting for me to make a move
my hands slowly get to work
mending and bending
and piecing you back together

my baby was such a perfect portrait
of integrity and devotion
and here,
my popsicle stick towers fall
my poor old castle wall

you slide right down my throat
and to my lungs
without wince or twitch
a single loosened stitch
and i wait for action
please baby, please just put me away

Labels: alcohol, alone, Nothing, writing